I’ve become somewhat fascinated by the human brain in recent years. Well, perhaps I’ve always been fascinated. It’s the specifics that change.
One idea that’s been capturing my attention is perception.
Specifically, much of the way we experience the world isn’t based on what is happening. It is linked to interpretation and prediction.
After all, we’re bombarded with information constantly. Sights. Sounds. Sensations. Many of these come from the outside world, but we also have our own emotions, thoughts, and physical sensations to deal with.
The sheer amount of information is staggering.
To make use of it, our brains need to figure out what all the information means.
We do so, at least in part, based on the past. Our previous experiences tell us much about what given pieces of information mean. We’re guided by other things too, like the values we were brought up with, the social norms, what we’ve seen other people do, etc.
Some theories suggest that we’re wired for survival. That we look for danger everywhere, so we’re more likely to have a negative interpretation compared to a positive one, unless we consciously train our brains to be different.
Interpretation is Needed
This process of prediction and interpretation is sometimes called storytelling.
We do that, all the time.
We’re storytellers. Meaning makers.
We don’t just see what’s happening around us or to us; we constantly seek to make meaning from it.
That storytelling practice isn’t bad.
Not at all.
Without it, we’d be in information overload. We wouldn’t be able to make wise decisions about our lives, about the future, or about anything really.
We need stories.
Stories Can Cause Suffering
We often create meaning unconsciously, without even realising we are.
This works well some of the time.
For example, if you learned how to push through adversity when you were young, you may have a tenacity that helps you to weather challenging times better than those around you.
Other times, the stories we tell are a bad fit.
For example, if you grew up with the idea that pushing through is always the right approach and you should never ‘give in’ to your emotions – then you may end up pushing yourself too hard and suppressing your emotions in an unhealthy way.
We Can Choose Better Stories
Part of what I’ve been touching on for work – and have been interested in myself – is the idea that we can create different stories. We can reinterpret the same situation in a different way.
Why not?
Much of the time, suffering comes from two key areas:
- What we think something means
- What we think should be happening
Both of those things are changeable.
There are countless examples of people doing just that. Examples of times where people who have had awful things happen to them, like the death of a spouse, losing a leg or even two following an accident, or being diagnosed with a terminal illness – and didn’t let those awful things win. People who found a new lease on life, a different sense of purpose. Who refused to be defined by the idea that an accident means their life is over or that it shouldn’t have happened.
Our minds are powerful.
Much more so than we ever realize.
Actively Changing Stories
Right now, I’m fascinated in how to change stories. The mechanisms. The tools.
Realising that we constantly interpret is part of the story. There’s no doubt about that.
Working out where those interpretations come from seems to help too, along with finding new interpretations.
So, if you often interpret silence as anger and are reactive, why? Where does that pattern come from? What else could silence mean?
I suspect that CBT and related approaches are relevant here, for those who take the therapeutic route. I haven’t been far enough through CBT myself to know.
There are techniques to change thought patterns, to adapt more positive ways of thinking. I noticed some in The Happiness Trap and Tony Robbins talked about them too.
Those seem like they should be helpful.
They’re not for me, but there are some quirks with my brain (including the fact that I can’t visualise and have limited autobiographical memory). I need to rely on my body instead. Change my feeling state.
I want to know more.
Seems like there must be so much more out there.
I do know, however, that I’ve been doing something like this on and off for years. Changing my interpretations. Looking for joy.
Looking for stories that are empowering and congruent with the situation. Stories that make sense and could be true.
Reminding myself, remembering, and learning that I love my life – whatever it looks like. That this is good. All of it. Even when it’s not. Even when it’s hard.
That I am strong. Resilient. And so much more besides.
